Be Defined by Godly, Loving Commitments

"Since everything around us is going to melt away, what holy, godly lives you should be living!" (2 Peter 3:11 LB)

Your commitments can develop you, or they can destroy you, but either way, they will define you. Tell me what you’re committed to, and I’ll tell you what you’ll be in twenty years.

It is at this very point of commitment that most people miss God’s purpose for their lives. Many are afraid to commit to anything, so they just drift through life. Others make half-hearted commitments to competing values, and that leads to frustration and mediocrity. Others make a full commitment to worldly goals, such as becoming wealthy or famous, and they end up disappointed and bitter.

Every choice we make has eternal consequences, so we need to choose wisely: “Since everything around us is going to melt away, what holy, godly lives you should be living!” (2 Peter 3:11 LB). As believers, we should be defined by godly, loving commitments. If we want to become more like Jesus, then we need to commit to the same things he did.

Talk about it

• What do your commitments say about you?
• What commitments do you need to let go of? Where do you need to make or renew commitments?

You Must Choose to Love God

“That you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.” (Deuteronomy 30:20 NIV)

Today we’ve bought into this myth that love is uncontrollable, that it’s something that just happens to us; it’s not something we control. In fact, even the language we use implies the uncontrollability of love. We say, “I fell in love,” as if love is some kind of a ditch. It’s like I’m walking along one day and — bam! — I fell in love. I couldn’t help myself.

But I have to tell you the truth: That’s not love. Love doesn’t just happen to you. Love is a choice, and it represents a commitment.

There’s no doubt about it: Attraction is uncontrollable, and arousal is uncontrollable. But attraction and arousal are not love. They can lead to love, but they are not love. Love is a choice.

You must choose to love God; he won’t force you to love him (Deuteronomy 30:20). You can thumb your nose at God and go a totally different way. You can destroy your life if you choose to do that. God still won’t force you to love him, because he knows love can’t be forced.

This same principle is true about your relationships: You can choose to love others, but God won’t force you to love anyone.

Talk About It

• How is love received differently when it’s understood that it is a choice?

• What is the difference between love that is from God and love that is based on human understanding?